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Jacob Saunders, 25, lives in Silver Spring, Maryland, and, in February, lost his job at the Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services, a US federal agency, as part of cutbacks orchestrated by the Department of Government Efficiency. He said he received an offer to return to CMS but declined. Business Insider verified his identity, that he worked for the federal government, and that he received an offer to return.
Growing up, I had family friends who had government jobs and spoke highly of them because of the benefits and the work itself. I saw that as an opportunity. In school, I earned a master’s in homeland security. It felt like a good gateway to a decent career.
After what felt like a long time of applying, I became a student intern at the Department of Homeland Security. I was there for nine months — until September 2024 — not long after I finished grad school.
It was a wonderful experience. The projects we worked on were often well-known in public and on the news. I really felt like I was able to make a difference.
After that, I went back to working part-time while looking for a full-time role. At the end of 2024, I got a job at the Center for Medicare and Medicaid Services. Even though it was different from Homeland Security, I enjoyed the work. Plus, the pay was competitive, and the benefits were good.
At CMS, I was essentially a business analyst on a team that managed a program for evaluating the medical care professionals provided and then allocated funding.
Signs of trouble
Not long after I started at CMS, I heard small talk about possible job cuts. One coworker jokingly said something like, “What if we all get fired?” Still, I wasn’t taking it too seriously.
A couple of days before I got let go, the news came out that the president had directed agencies to fire probationary employees. That’s when I became concerned.
The day before I got fired, I checked my email every two seconds, but there was no notice. The next day, February 15, was a Saturday, and I was home. I opened my work laptop, and the message was there.
Even though I saw it coming, I was still surprised. Your heart sinks. I think I said something aloud like, “Oh, no. Why did this happen?”
My supervisor didn’t even know I was going to be fired. I had to text them that day to tell them. I was the only one from my team of 14 or 15 people who was cut.
That was disappointing because it felt like everybody on my team was rooting for me to get up to speed and become a valued contributor. I felt like I did my best to be professional and do what I was supposed to do. On top of that, I miss the people.
My firing felt impersonal because the reason cited, which everybody got and I know is illegitimate, was related to how I did my job. The email said something like, “We deem from your performance that you’re unfit for the position.” It sucked to hear that from somebody I’d never met.
Besides, I was only there for five weeks. You can’t really evaluate somebody based on that short amount of time.
Luckily, I wasn’t that far removed from the part-time jobs I’d had before I went to CMS.
The night I got fired, I texted my old boss from my job as a high school lacrosse coach for the JV team. I could jump back into that position because they hadn’t found a replacement. I was also a flag football referee on the weekend, so I’ve returned to that as well.
I was grateful my old jobs still had spots for me; they could have said no.
The callback
But a month after being fired from CMS, my old supervisor called one morning and explained that I could return. They said they needed an answer later that day.
I was conflicted because it was a joyful place to work. I’d love to go back and pretend everything was back to normal. Unfortunately, that’s just not reality. I was already fired once, so I’ll never feel secure there, at least while this administration is in office.
It had only been a month, so I don’t want to say I’d moved on, but I had moved forward. When they offered a chance to return, I thought, “I have these other jobs now, and I can’t drop everything just to go back.”
I wouldn’t have had enough time to give two weeks’ notice to the people who rehired me for my part-time jobs. They came through for me when I needed them, and it’s only right that I stay true to my commitment. I just don’t think I could leave them like that.
Luckily, I’m living with my parents, so these jobs help me avoid spending my savings on food and gas.
I’m keeping an open mind
I’d still like to find something else that would benefit my career. Getting a full-time job hasn’t been easy, but you’ve just got to be consistent and apply every day, and eventually, an opportunity will come.
For now, I’m looking for jobs in the private sector and state government. I want to find something that will give me a future. It looks like a federal job is unlikely, even though that’s what I prefer. Working for something bigger than yourself is always good.
When I was in government, and someone would ask what I did, I was excited to tell them. It felt like it was impressive and I would like to continue that aspect of it — of public service. Yet, it’s also more than possible I’ll find something in the private sector where I believe in the mission.
I’ve been doing my best to keep an open mind. The silver lining to all of this is it is a chance to reset and re-evaluate.
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