This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Sara Bustillo de Castro, a VP based in Madrid. Business Insider has verified her employment at a global consultancy firm. The following has been edited for length and clarity.
I moved with my family to Spain, where I’m from, after living in the UK for two years. I’m much happier and healthier than I was, and I can see us here for the next 10 years.
I had my first child in Paris in 2020. My husband and I were both working full-time and far from both our families, which was difficult. I worked for a global consultancy company. We had a full-time childminder. They would take care of our daughter in their home, with several other children, from when our daughter was five months old.
In France, childcare at a childminder’s home is regulated by the state and subsidized based on income. Some parents can pay as little as 300 euros, which is around $320, a month for one child. Our income was at the higher end, so we paid full price, which was 800 euros, about $860, a month.
It was flexible, and the childminder would also take care of our daughter if she fell ill.
Childcare in the UK was expensive and hard to access
When my daughter was 18 months old, in August 2021, our family moved to Cambridge for my husband’s job. I was able to transfer my job at a consultancy firm to the London office and work hybrid.
Childcare was completely different in the UK from France. Even getting a spot in the nursery was difficult. There was only one nursery place available in the city. It was in the north, and we lived in the south. It was a 45-minute drive each way.
I had my second child in April 2022. Both my children were in the same nursery. Full-time nursery care a month per child cost £1,400, which is about $1,700.
Both my husband and I had demanding jobs, and we didn’t have any childcare support apart from nursery. It was extremely hard.
The system made it hard to manage childcare and work
When our children were ill, they were sent home for two days under the nursery policy. Sometimes, they’d need to see a doctor before they were allowed to go back to the nursery. It can be difficult to get doctor’s appointments quickly in the UK. That made things complicated for us as working parents.
One day, in November 2021, when our daughter was ill, I had to cancel my meetings for a consulting project I was project managing to take her to get a COVID-19 test. These consultancy projects are time-sensitive, and I was under pressure. For three days, I looked after our daughter in the morning, and my husband looked after her in the afternoon so I could go back to work. It was very stressful.
Something like that would happen every two or three weeks. I’d be on work calls and hear one of the children crying in the background. I felt like I wasn’t working well, and I wasn’t parenting well, either.
The nursery would sometimes turn parents away at the door
Sometimes, there weren’t enough nursery employees to look after all the children. The nursery employees would send a message to parents in the morning saying they could only take five children that day, for example.
There’d be a line of parents waiting outside the nursery, and after the available places were filled, the parents at the end of the line would have to take their children home.
It was pretty harsh.
We decided to move to Spain
I liked the UK’s entrepreneurial spirit and food, but we weren’t happy.
Not only was the childcare expensive, but it was also a very individualistic place, and I felt isolated. We asked our neighbors in Cambridge if they wanted to have dinner, and though they said yes several times, it never happened. In Spain, when you say you’ll go for dinner, you set the date. Something like that seemed to happen in every single relationship that we had with British people.
We moved to Madrid in August 2023. Childcare was a big factor, but we also wanted to be near my family and have more of a support network.
My firm wouldn’t let me transfer from London to Madrid, so I took voluntary redundancy. My biggest fear was that job opportunities would be more limited in Madrid, but I started a new job as a VP for an aviation company in April. I’m now earning more than I was in the UK.
People here seem healthier, and healthcare is easier to access.
The quality of childcare is better and cheaper
My youngest child is still in nursery, which is a 10-minute walk from our home, and very flexible.
People are warmer and more caring toward children than they were in the UK, though maybe it’s just expressed differently.
If my son is a little ill, the nursery workers don’t send him home immediately. Instead, they look after him. It feels like I’m leaving him with a family member — like a delegated maternal figure. I never felt like that in the UK.
It’s 540 euros, which is about $580, a month for a full-time nursery for one child.
We have home help too
My husband and I were worried about who would look after our daughter, who is at school if she fell ill. We hired someone to work at home, which wouldn’t have been affordable in the UK. They manage cleaning, shopping, and childcare when needed. The help costs us 1,750 euros a month for 40 hours a week.
They make things much easier — I realize we’re very privileged.
It’s nice being near family, too. They don’t help out that much with the childcare but it’s good for the heart.