I grew up in Virginia Beach, Virginia, and later attended grad school in New York City.
Shortly after I finished school, I moved back to my hometown. I was convinced I’d have an easier time finding writing work in a smaller, tight-knit city that I was already familiar with.
I began immersing myself in the local improv and theater scenes to find fellow creatives. Unfortunately, I never found a great job or fully felt like I fit in with the community.
So, I took a deep breath, packed two suitcases, and headed from Virginia Beach back to NYC in 2016. I hoped that in a bigger city I’d be able to find a better job and a community where I felt more like I belonged.
NYC was fun for a while, but it still wasn’t perfect for me
At first, New York City felt like a breath of fresh air, despite the garbage smell it pelted me with every time I walked down the wrong side street.
In such a big city, I could network far more easily, parlaying chance meetings into new freelance gigs, gradually building myself a satisfying writing career.
That said, something still felt off. I couldn’t vibe with the city’s fast pace and the ultra-competitiveness and ambition of many people around me.
Although I appreciated being surrounded by many loud and proud queer individuals and having a social calendar full of parties and dating apps full of potential matches, I struggled to keep up as an introvert.
Plus, I felt financially stretched. I made only a modest salary and, yes, the rent in New York City was just too damn high.
By the time the coronavirus pandemic sent the city into lockdown in 2020, I felt unmoored. My lease was up for renewal, my job was already fully remote, and I could no longer even see my friends in person.
The ability to work from anywhere began to appeal to me more than ever, especially since I wanted to start actually saving money. I decided it was time to move back to Virginia.
I sorted out my priorities in Virginia and used my hometown as a launchpad for my dream life
While working my remote job in Virginia, I spent way less on rent — $400 a month for my own one-bedroom place instead of $850 for a three-bedroom apartment shared with two others in NYC.
That, plus the general lower cost of living, meant that I was able to put away (relative) heaps of cash. The $1,200 a month I’d typically spend on groceries, bills, and transportation in NYC had been nearly halved in Virginia Beach.
I missed my friends in New York, but as the world opened up again, I reconnected with ones in Virginia. Ultimately, my rebooted support system, coupled with my newfound financial security and relaxed pace of life, allowed me to engage in some serious introspection.
I had accepted, thanks to pandemic lockdowns, that everything I knew and loved (and had taken for granted) could be removed at any moment.
So, I began to think about what I really wanted, including the dreams I’d once had to write more fiction, achieve fluency in a foreign language, and, above all, travel the world.
This time, I finally had the money saved to make the jump, and I no longer had excuses — I’d already tried years of living at home and in NYC, and neither felt right.
So, I began Spanish and French lessons, worked hard to publish more writing, and left Virginia for a swimming competition in Denmark to kick off my life as a full-time digital nomad.
Turns out that Virginia Beach was a pretty great launchpad for helping me build a life that has made me happier than ever.
